I immediately knew.
I will try to make it brief. (I said try. Not promise).
When I was about 8, there were a boy and girl (siblings) who I equally adored (her) and loathed (him). She had saved my life once, for real, when I managed to slip and fall down in the fastest current of our local river swimming hole, and found myself suddenly sputtering and tumbling along in a part of the river that was strong enough to CARRY ME ALL THE WAY DOWN THE WHOLE RIVER AND POSSIBLY THROUGH THE DAM WHERE I WOULD SURELY DIE. aieeeeeeeee
She saved me by simply stepping into the water and grabbing my scrawny self, and saying, "Put your feet down". It was like 6" deep. But I was reallyreallyreally sure I almost died, right there; and Diane saved me, for real, so I adored her.
Her brother, Dale...I loathed. I don't even remember *why*. I just remember despising him. I remember that he was bigger than us, and he was hateful and greasy and mean, and us younger kids all hated him, especially me. I hated him with the fire of a thousand suns, with all the hate an 8-year-old could muster.
|Still waters, guys.|
"You're BACON! AND I LOVE BACON!!!!"
I meant that to sound like..."You are the one thing I want to rip with my teeth and just...destroy." Instead, there was this shocked silence from the other kids. Then:
Them: AaaaahhhhhahahahahahahaHAHAHAHA. You LOVE DALE!! She loves Daaa-aaale!
Me: NO!! Aughh! I hate him! I want to BITE him. (I actually had a bit of a reputation for literally biting people at that age, but that's a different story)
Them: Stef and DAy-le, sitting in a tree, K-I-S-S-I-N-G!!!
They would not be dissuaded. Hysterical childish laughter still echoes in my head.
I've been saying dumb stuff like that, pretty much ever since.
What's your earliest awkward foot-in-mouth memory? Didn't we all have that one kid we wished would just disappear?