|NOT THIS. NOT THIS!!! DO YOU HEAR ME!? NOT THIS! See the grapes? Eat those.|
|OR THIS EITHER, YOU IDIOT. Just stop it. Leave the kitchen.|
I need to superglue these to my refrigerator door and possibly the cabinets, the sink, and the bathroom mirror.
You may know that we are trying to merge over to a healthier way of eating, because I KNOW it's the better choice. Not strictly vegan or vegetarian but a definite shift away from processed foods, sugar, meat, and dairy. And everything else we love. (I'm an almost-famous ex-pastry chef, for crying out loud!) But God BLESS IT, it's been a total pain to have the willpower (and the constant supply of vegetables on hand) to make it happen.
For example. I wake up every day thinking, yeah, today I will ROCK THIS NEW DIET. I will work out for like an HOUR, minimum, with cardio and weights and core training. I got this. I will be SO buff by my birthday (Easter/Mother's Day/beach weather/back to school/Christmas/New Year's, definitely by the end of the year. Seriously) this year. I mean it. Totally I will become a work-out and fitness fanATic. Pretty much, starting today. Or possibly tomorrow, because today's half over...
Then my eat-what-sounds-good habit/life kicks in, and so far today I've had:
--A cup of hot chocolate. (okaaaay. I do that every day, so that's a given)
--Half a banana. (OMG girl, you are such a diet freak)
--A hot turkey and provalone panini (What? OK, OK!! But it WAS on homemade 100% wholewheat bread...with Best Foods slathered all over it...Grade: C- for lunch choice)
--Coffee with nondairy creamer (I don't even DRINK coffee any more. What the heck??)
Yeah. So far I'm FREAKING AWESOME at this. I have lost (and gained and lost and gained) the same 5 pounds like 3 times since we started. The word "plateau" sounds more like a curse, right now. I have been "at a plateau" FOR ABOUT 10 YEARS. I don't need more advice about THAT, and I sure can't reduce my calories any further. I could work out more, but the idea of seriously working out for an hour, every day, makes me super cranky and frowny and mad at the 28-year-old me who thought she was fat 25 pounds ago. I want to go back and slap her.
There's hope, though. I could still have a smoothie for a snack and curried cauliflower with spinach salad for dinner. Because, yes, that sounds so yummy (that's sarcasm, guys). But, we're out of yogurt. And spinach. Aaaand, there's a whole pork roast with cheesy mashed potato leftovers in the fridge from last night, so tonight is probably shot. (It was SUNday. Come ON).
Well, at least I'm totally wearing a sports bra right now. Just in case I actually go upstairs and get on our exercise bike...because I'm prepared like that.
Gahhh. Wish me luck. It's going to be a bumpy ride.
I keep trying to leave our cabinets and fridge devoid of any other choices, but it's sure not an overnight transition, let me tell you! Because when you're craving carbs and dairy...carrots and tofu just do not do it.
No. They. Don't.
Anyone else having trouble making a switch to a healthier diet, I'd love to hear from you.